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/r/TwoSentenceSadness

I was surprised when the mystical orb told me that immortality serums had been a thing for over 20 years now.

205 upvotes • Tartarus_itself
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My school was built with no room numbers to prevent people from arranging drug deals in specific rooms.

205 upvotes • dickcheney600
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I'm sorry for not hugging you tighter.

205 upvotes • userxblade
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I phoned your number, just to hear your voice on the answer machine once more.

204 upvotes • SpyShine
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I should be mature, I should calm and I should be everything adult are.

204 upvotes • -Silent_Lullaby-
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I watched as that poor mother elephant, bald and well bred, drooped in a cross-eyed heap beneath a mask of perfume and weed smoke, clown clamor and ivory billiards caroming.

204 upvotes • EccentricShmop
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Every time you tell me you love me, I worry.

204 upvotes • TheSwedishFishTheory
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”I can’t wait to tell John tomorrow that we’re expecting!”

204 upvotes • Diabetic_T-Rex
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“I want my mummy, she said I can’t talk to strangers”

204 upvotes • Koda_kola
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Dropped my spaghetti

204 upvotes • tetromint_teh2nd
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