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/u/Jussi_Wade_1755's posts

I’ve decided to go on 1000 diets at once!

73 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceComedy
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Why couldn’t the green pepper practice archery?

69 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceComedy
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I got invited to a baby shower.

62 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceComedy
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My best friend started their new job and I wanted to say something encouraging to them.

59 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceComedy
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My family has a lockbox at the bank containing the family jewels. NSFW

46 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceHorror
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When I asked my girlfriend to tell me something she never told me before and she replied she wants to try eating pussy. NSFW

30 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceHorror
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Finally realizing what I truly am.

28 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceSadness
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A guy was having a heart attack but, the doctor couldn’t get near him

17 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceComedy
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I’m very sorry we really needed the money.

17 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceSadness
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I was so liked and popular at my old job.

16 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceComedy
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