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/u/dickcheney600's posts

I walked by the slot machine and saw that it had 9 credits forgotten on it.

85 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceComedy
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I was playing SkeeBall when I saw a giant mouse and started throwing the balls at it.

80 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceComedy
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I tried to log back in to the online support group that the other hospital patients made.

79 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceSadness
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I told my boss that I was leaving in two weeks, to enjoy the last two months of my life.

75 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceSadness
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I have to return the new TV I bought, because I lost my job today.

74 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceSadness
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After spending months in prototyping, design and testing, I made a product that upper management decided was good enough to sell.

74 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceSadness
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If only the fire alarms at my son's school at worked, he might still be here today.

69 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceSadness
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I tiptoed by the medicine cabinet.

68 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceComedy
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A friend of mine posted on Facebook that she wished she had never been born, and I panicked and called her to either convince her not to kill herself, or just to say goodbye if I couldn't sway her.

65 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceSadness
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A lot of newer phones have automatic brightness

63 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceComedy
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