/r/AntiJokes

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A man walks into a bar, and half his head's an orange

176 upvotes • gogybo

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What’s frozen and annoying at breakfast?

65 upvotes • Major_Independence82

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I told my music teacher that I wanted to be a jazz pianist, so I played him a piece that I made. When I finished, he said that I would never make it as a profession, so I sighed and bashed my head all over the piano.

52 upvotes • incredibleinkpen

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What did Plato, Aristotle, Pocahontas, Geronimo, and Nostradamus all have in common?

44 upvotes • gotmojo6

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A Russian and an American are sitting together

36 upvotes • Hungry_Mouse737

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Why do giraffes not eat meat?

30 upvotes • OneQuadrillionOwls

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What kind of shoes do kidnappers wear.

26 upvotes • TwisterUprocker

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My neighbor complained that my dogs pee on his yard.

21 upvotes • gotmojo6

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what did the blind chicken say after he crossed the road?

17 upvotes • elhermanobrother

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A Capitalist, a Socialist, a Communist, and a Clown Walk into a Bar...

15 upvotes • CacheMoney7529

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Title	Upvotes	Author	Mark as read	Favorited	Rating	Add to a list
A man walks into a bar, and half his head's an orange	176	gogybo
What’s frozen and annoying at breakfast?	65	Major_Independence82
I told my music teacher that I wanted to be a jazz pianist, so I played him a piece that I made. When I finished, he said that I would never make it as a profession, so I sighed and bashed my head all over the piano.	52	incredibleinkpen
What did Plato, Aristotle, Pocahontas, Geronimo, and Nostradamus all have in common?	44	gotmojo6
A Russian and an American are sitting together	36	Hungry_Mouse737
Why do giraffes not eat meat?	30	OneQuadrillionOwls
What kind of shoes do kidnappers wear.	26	TwisterUprocker
My neighbor complained that my dogs pee on his yard.	21	gotmojo6
what did the blind chicken say after he crossed the road?	17	elhermanobrother
A Capitalist, a Socialist, a Communist, and a Clown Walk into a Bar...	15	CacheMoney7529