/r/TwoSentenceComedy

Year:

Only show posts with narrations

Here at Amazon, we can go to the bathroom whenever we want.

15 upvotes • GrimmRetails

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When I die, I want to die peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather.

15 upvotes • DaM3meLoRd694

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“Thomas Jefferson lives.”

15 upvotes • Standard_Emu6202

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The cannibal smiled in glee

15 upvotes • [deleted]

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I lay in a hospital bed, dying of my cancer.

15 upvotes • memeuwill

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“Ugh, I hate those Christian shows, they always put people like me in a bad light,” grumbled my roommate

15 upvotes • KailTheDryad

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I read in the newspaper that Cuomo had been elected president.

15 upvotes • Cinimodder

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What's the difference between a wife who confuses household appliances and a prostitute?

15 upvotes • That_Charming_Otter

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Suburbia is full of convinces. NSFW

15 upvotes • Marshalljoe

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I was fired from my job at the US Mint today...

15 upvotes • WellingtonSears

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Title	Upvotes	Author	Mark as read	Favorited	Rating	Add to a list
Here at Amazon, we can go to the bathroom whenever we want.	15	GrimmRetails
When I die, I want to die peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather.	15	DaM3meLoRd694
“Thomas Jefferson lives.”	15	Standard_Emu6202
The cannibal smiled in glee	15	[deleted]
I lay in a hospital bed, dying of my cancer.	15	memeuwill
“Ugh, I hate those Christian shows, they always put people like me in a bad light,” grumbled my roommate	15	KailTheDryad
I read in the newspaper that Cuomo had been elected president.	15	Cinimodder
What's the difference between a wife who confuses household appliances and a prostitute?	15	That_Charming_Otter
Suburbia is full of convinces. NSFW	15	Marshalljoe
I was fired from my job at the US Mint today...	15	WellingtonSears