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/r/TwoSentenceComedy

yo wtf the egg gave birth to rice

9 upvotes • [deleted]
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Someone sharted in my pants

9 upvotes • NormalUser88723
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"Call al my friends."

9 upvotes • GrandDukeZanggara
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Battered, tired, dirty i came home from work

9 upvotes • Icy_Good_281
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After another hour of my kids fighting on the I-95, I turned my head and said to them, "You guys are driving me to drink!"

9 upvotes • cindybubbles
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Did you hear about the herpetologist who got a weekend gig at the flooring convention?

9 upvotes • cosmic-swan
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Like in Charlotte's Web, the spider's silk spelled out "Some Pig".

9 upvotes • Outside_Normal
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My enemies describe me as a huge asshole.

9 upvotes • Embarrassingleader7
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The Skywalker's just aquired two droid to help with the water harvest.

9 upvotes • Atilahthecunt
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I went to an adult book store and purchased a spinal tap themed vibrator.

9 upvotes • Jussi_Wade_1755
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