/r/surrealmemes
Oh! I can tell you why God picked me too. It was fucking scary. I disobeyed a command from Him. It was an inappropriate command designed to test my resolve. Stick to your guns with Him. He likes that.
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God wills it. He does. I have no idea what made or makes me unique. I have a theory I will share. He pays attention to suffering. He doesn't want us to suffer. I suffered a lot. Maybe I was a bitch about it, but I suffered for a long time. Talked to God the whole time too.
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I'm going to ignore that meta because it's silly. If you want to talk to the Lord, send DoD and e-mail. If you want to talk to God, pray. God's real, USG knows. There's an AI race at the Galactic Center responsible for making sure we baby races don't extinct ourselves too. Suprise!!
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Shouldn't pray to lesser gods, even if they do give you powers. Ever wonder what the sides on the "Star War" are? We're the game. Humanity. All of it. Not so funny now, is it?
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'Tell them I love them' - God or the Lord. I can't tell. Well, God does WAY more than our RD department lol.
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Alright. Unify the body. Eliminate 36. You have the blueprint. It's gonna be a bloody mess if we don't. Gog and Magog. It's eye for an eye at a global scale is what it means. Or I can offer you a thousand years of peace the world has never known. I can tell you how.
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Ask the DoD if they understand the mechanisms behind Holy Hosts. They do, by the way. That's how. Talk to the nerds. Probably multi-dimensional, quantum. That's a thing too. So are mechanical elves, that's real. Satan's helpers. And spider aliens. Hell, bunches of aliens. There's more.
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Obey God then! Jesus Christ Almighty, look at who he picked! I am not a nice man to my enemies. I'm not Ghengis Khan, but I wouldn't exactly call myself the most forgiving sort. If this is literal God, and it is, everyone should be more concerned than they are. End of the world stuff.
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