/u/AlmostSane67's posts in /r/TwoSentenceHorror

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Only show posts with narrations

I told the genie, "I want to be so famous, that people will still know who I am 100 years from now!"

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I hit a pedestrian with my car, and even though she didn't seem to be injured, I offered to drive her to the hospital and gave her some Tylenol.

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My wife and I got in an argument over whether we should let our son come out of the closet.

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It's my own fault that I'm trapped in this room with this horrid creature, drops of saliva rolling down its flabby jowls and its greedy eyes staring at me like I'm just a piece of meat.

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Please, honey, don't fight me on this, it's for your own good.

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I thought my girlfriend would appreciate me trying to role-play "Fifty Shades of Grey " with her last night.

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I don't consider myself to be a hero, but I prevented my neighbors' wife from being kidnapped (and possibly raped and murdered!) today.

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"Your wife has been cheating on you, and she hired a hit man to take you out."

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"I can't believe I was stupid enough to trip going down the stairs," I thought to myself, as I landed in a crumpled, twisted mess at the bottom.

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My husband of 16 years was just sentenced to death for the brutal rape and murder of a 28 year old woman.

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Title	Upvotes	Mark as read	Favorited	Rating	Add to a list
I told the genie, "I want to be so famous, that people will still know who I am 100 years from now!"	1
I hit a pedestrian with my car, and even though she didn't seem to be injured, I offered to drive her to the hospital and gave her some Tylenol.	1
My wife and I got in an argument over whether we should let our son come out of the closet.	1
It's my own fault that I'm trapped in this room with this horrid creature, drops of saliva rolling down its flabby jowls and its greedy eyes staring at me like I'm just a piece of meat.	1
Please, honey, don't fight me on this, it's for your own good.	1
I thought my girlfriend would appreciate me trying to role-play "Fifty Shades of Grey " with her last night.	1
I don't consider myself to be a hero, but I prevented my neighbors' wife from being kidnapped (and possibly raped and murdered!) today.	1
"Your wife has been cheating on you, and she hired a hit man to take you out."	1
"I can't believe I was stupid enough to trip going down the stairs," I thought to myself, as I landed in a crumpled, twisted mess at the bottom.	1
My husband of 16 years was just sentenced to death for the brutal rape and murder of a 28 year old woman.	1