/u/Avalon_88's posts
[WP] After being shot multiple times, you are horrified at the sight of your blood as you bleed red... and blue, and yellow, and green, and-
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[WP] Before being sealed, the demon lord banished the hero to our modern world. 10 years later, the demon lord appeared before the retired hero and took the hero's wife hostage. When the kingdom summoned a hero from another world, they were shocked to find their old hero answering the call.
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[WP] For the millionth time he had to explain that he was undying. He was not undead, immortality is a completely different thing. He was just undying.
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[EU] An immortal witch living in downtown new york summons a familiar to protect her from superheroes and supervillains stalking the alleyways around her home. She ends up summoning Gilgamesh, Cu Chulainn, and some guy in red who cooks an excellent intercontinental breakfast.
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[WP]"No, you aren't allowed to drink anymore. Last time you drank you made the cure for cancer, before that you halted the secret invasion of body snatching aliens, and before that you came back from alternate narnia as its unquestioned ruler and savior. Worst part is you were too drunk to remember"
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[WP]A race of brain parasite aliens plan to invade earth. One of their scouts infects a man retired in the suburbs, who is attacked by heavily armed men moments later. Confused and still not adapted to the new body the alien hears a thought from the host. "Let me out if you want to live."
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[WP]As the party is about to be sacrificed by a cult, the two barbarians talk. "I've always admired how you cut your foes in two so neatly." "Well I admire that time you got turned into a 3000 meter colossus just so you could piledriver tiamat.". One of the cultists reacted, "That was you?"
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[WP] Gods do not fear men, for men are their creations. But the gods fear living metal, for they did not make living metal. Man made living metal.
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[WP] Once a ghost knows you can see them, they will attack you. That's a well-known fact. But whenever you make eye contact with ghosts, they immediately fly off as if terrified. One day on your morning commute, the person who always sits across you comments, "So you're really alive?"
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