/u/Exxile4000's posts in /r/TwoSentenceHorror

Year:

"We'll keep this our little secret, mommy doesn't need to know."

7709 upvotes

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"So you see, this is why I recommend you buy our premium home security package," I barely finished the sentence before the homeowner slammed the door in my face.

1767 upvotes

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My dad always told me that working at a crematorium wasn't a job for everyone.

1733 upvotes

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I don't know what I expected to find when I began studying the Earth to learn more about its core.

1555 upvotes

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Even though my dog has been missing for two weeks now, I still wake up with a fresh bone at the foot of my bed.

377 upvotes

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"Dad my night light went out." I let my son into bed with his mother while I walked in to fix the light.

168 upvotes

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Late at night, I was awaken to a loud knock on my door.

156 upvotes

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Mommy always gives me medicine when my stomach isn't feeling well, but I don't want to wake her up, so I'll get it myself.

156 upvotes

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Being paralyzed wasn't the worst thing I could imagine.

116 upvotes

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I wasn't screaming at the thought of my phone getting wet, or my hair, or anything like that.

107 upvotes

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Title	Upvotes	Mark as read	Favorited	Rating	Add to a list
"We'll keep this our little secret, mommy doesn't need to know."	7709
"So you see, this is why I recommend you buy our premium home security package," I barely finished the sentence before the homeowner slammed the door in my face.	1767
My dad always told me that working at a crematorium wasn't a job for everyone.	1733
I don't know what I expected to find when I began studying the Earth to learn more about its core.	1555
Even though my dog has been missing for two weeks now, I still wake up with a fresh bone at the foot of my bed.	377
"Dad my night light went out." I let my son into bed with his mother while I walked in to fix the light.	168
Late at night, I was awaken to a loud knock on my door.	156
Mommy always gives me medicine when my stomach isn't feeling well, but I don't want to wake her up, so I'll get it myself.	156
Being paralyzed wasn't the worst thing I could imagine.	116
I wasn't screaming at the thought of my phone getting wet, or my hair, or anything like that.	107