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/u/GrimmRetails's posts

Straight away, the proctologist knew I was lying.

202 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceComedy
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[Nsfw] My girlfriend saw the size of a horse's penis and broke up with me. NSFW

193 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceComedy
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"Are there any side effects, Doc?"

187 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceComedy
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My first film credit was a tutorial on how to administer enemas.

166 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceComedy
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"Happy New Year," I slurred my greeting at the tall pale stranger at the end of the street.

123 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceComedy
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Baby shoes for sale.

117 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceComedy
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On day three of searching for the cruise passenger who went overboard, the detective was already losing patience.

108 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceComedy
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At the cemetery I saw a grave marked Coffin.

101 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceComedy
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Two hungry little boys found the biscuits on top of the fridge.

93 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceSadness
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"You're going to wear that costume for the rest of your life and nothing will ever change that."

88 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceSadness
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