/u/GuyAwks's posts in /r/TwoSentenceHorror

Year:

Providing books for the captive in my dungeon, I’m nothing if not merciful.

11 upvotes

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It really paid off hiring a string quartet to serenade my date in my living room.

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I’m so excited to finally be going on reality TV, I think as I hang up the phone.

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My impulsive wife once filled our house with artificial snow to match a snow globe she’d bought.

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We all live in a yellow submarine, we didn’t like the colour so we painted it green.

10 upvotes

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In the middle of a vigorous hula hoop workout, I feel one of my hoops detach and go flying.

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I hate it when my fellow passengers clap and cheer as the plane lands safely.

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My absentminded worker has seemingly always got his head in the clouds.

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Imagine my luck that there’s not a single person in line for the music festival portaloos.

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“She goes to another school” I lie when my schoolmates ask why they’ve never met my girlfriend.

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Title	Upvotes	Mark as read	Favorited	Rating	Add to a list
Providing books for the captive in my dungeon, I’m nothing if not merciful.	11
It really paid off hiring a string quartet to serenade my date in my living room.	11
I’m so excited to finally be going on reality TV, I think as I hang up the phone.	11
My impulsive wife once filled our house with artificial snow to match a snow globe she’d bought.	11
We all live in a yellow submarine, we didn’t like the colour so we painted it green.	10
In the middle of a vigorous hula hoop workout, I feel one of my hoops detach and go flying.	10
I hate it when my fellow passengers clap and cheer as the plane lands safely.	10
My absentminded worker has seemingly always got his head in the clouds.	10
Imagine my luck that there’s not a single person in line for the music festival portaloos.	10
“She goes to another school” I lie when my schoolmates ask why they’ve never met my girlfriend.	10