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/u/PurpleAngel23's posts in /r/TwoSentenceHorror

The girl I drunkenly hooked up with is now pregnant.

384 upvotes
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After 10 years in the FBI and thousands of cases, I felt competent working the child pornography crimes.

348 upvotes
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I thought the late night knocking in my walls was either my sleep deprived mind or mice.

296 upvotes
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I was pulling my soppy clothes from the washer, when I noticed my sweater was stuck, so I tugged on it.

264 upvotes
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“Oh shit; I’m allergic to mushrooms.”

247 upvotes
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I love feeding my girlfriend

232 upvotes
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As an NSA agent, I’m pretty used to navigating covert camera feeds.

231 upvotes
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He pumped faster, eager to drain himself inside her. NSFW

229 upvotes
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I’m facing first degree assault charges for beating the shit out of me niece’s teacher for sexually assaulting her, but it was worth it.

224 upvotes
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I walked in on my husband having sex with our daughter.

212 upvotes
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