/u/SolipSchism's posts in /r/TwoSentenceHorror

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Does two life sentences count?

30 upvotes

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I heard my wife talking to her mother about how my weird brother-in-law used to make balloon animals when he was a kid, so I asked him to do it for my son’s birthday party. NSFW

29 upvotes

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As a nurse, one of my biggest responsibilities is to make sure doctors’ mistakes are fixed before they accidentally kill someone.

28 upvotes

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My heart sank as my wife showed me where our six-year-old had bitten her.

25 upvotes

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“We were only able to identify the victim from their dental records,” the investigator said during the press conference.

23 upvotes

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As the cop who pulled me over flashed his badge, I noticed that it was fake.

21 upvotes

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My wife gloated over the note our daughter wrote that said “I love you mommy but daddy was not fair.” NSFW

21 upvotes

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All the recent hubbub about aliens in Las Vegas is exciting.

21 upvotes

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I always thought I’d be the kind of person who would stop and try to make things right if I ran over someone’s pet.

20 upvotes

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“If there isn’t a law against it, then you have no reason to detain me.”

16 upvotes

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Title	Upvotes	Mark as read	Favorited	Rating	Add to a list
Does two life sentences count?	30
I heard my wife talking to her mother about how my weird brother-in-law used to make balloon animals when he was a kid, so I asked him to do it for my son’s birthday party. NSFW	29
As a nurse, one of my biggest responsibilities is to make sure doctors’ mistakes are fixed before they accidentally kill someone.	28
My heart sank as my wife showed me where our six-year-old had bitten her.	25
“We were only able to identify the victim from their dental records,” the investigator said during the press conference.	23
As the cop who pulled me over flashed his badge, I noticed that it was fake.	21
My wife gloated over the note our daughter wrote that said “I love you mommy but daddy was not fair.” NSFW	21
All the recent hubbub about aliens in Las Vegas is exciting.	21
I always thought I’d be the kind of person who would stop and try to make things right if I ran over someone’s pet.	20
“If there isn’t a law against it, then you have no reason to detain me.”	16