/u/Sweet_Neighborhood10's posts in /r/TwoSentenceComedy

Year:

Only show posts with narrations

The man chanted “Bloody Mary” three times at the mirror while balking at the absurdity of the ritual. NSFW

135 upvotes

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“Do you have the time, to listen to me whine??”

68 upvotes

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My pet pig was named “Chris P. Bacon”.

57 upvotes

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Is it a good thing to give someone horse meat?

10 upvotes

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Why is the sun so bright tonight?

9 upvotes

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The pet cat earnestly climbed on my shoulder like a faithful parrot.

6 upvotes

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I carry a steaming cup of coffee into my living room to watch some morning television. NSFW

5 upvotes

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I exclaimed to the girl strolling on the sidewalk with a dog by her side, “did you fall from heaven? cuz it looks like you just came straight from Hell”

4 upvotes

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The sky is shrouded in opaque darkness and bonfires are a blazing.

3 upvotes

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My workplace is chaotic and unsanitary, I mop and sweep up all the messes the customers make.

1 upvotes

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Title	Upvotes	Mark as read	Favorited	Rating	Add to a list
The man chanted “Bloody Mary” three times at the mirror while balking at the absurdity of the ritual. NSFW	135
“Do you have the time, to listen to me whine??”	68
My pet pig was named “Chris P. Bacon”.	57
Is it a good thing to give someone horse meat?	10
Why is the sun so bright tonight?	9
The pet cat earnestly climbed on my shoulder like a faithful parrot.	6
I carry a steaming cup of coffee into my living room to watch some morning television. NSFW	5
I exclaimed to the girl strolling on the sidewalk with a dog by her side, “did you fall from heaven? cuz it looks like you just came straight from Hell”	4
The sky is shrouded in opaque darkness and bonfires are a blazing.	3
My workplace is chaotic and unsanitary, I mop and sweep up all the messes the customers make.	1