/u/cindybubbles's posts

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I was lactose intolerant as a child and allergic to gluten as a teen.

111 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceComedy

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I beat my wife every day.

107 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceComedy

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As a dealer in a casino, I see a lot of people bet their life savings and lose it all in the same day.

107 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceSadness

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Today my partner of 50 years told me that he had to end the relationship because he's married.

105 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceSadness

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"Kids, it's dinner time!" my mom called out to us.

103 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceComedy

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Polly’s stink caused a 6-car pileup while heading to the morgue, her heavy casket flipped over and crushed three pallbearers, and three men threw out their backs while digging her grave.

102 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceComedy

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The man on the skyscraper looked down on the people below him egging him on.

102 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceSadness

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Every night, I walk into my patients’ rooms and deeply massage their newborns’ heads, telling the moms that it’s beneficial for their brains.

101 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceHorror

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Last night, I found a peanut that was rotten, ate it anyway and got sick.

100 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceComedy

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My wife seemed to have forgiven my affair when she asked me to go get the laundry from the basement.

100 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceHorror

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Title	Upvotes	Subreddit	Mark as read	Favorited	Rating	Add to a list
I was lactose intolerant as a child and allergic to gluten as a teen.	111	TwoSentenceComedy
I beat my wife every day.	107	TwoSentenceComedy
As a dealer in a casino, I see a lot of people bet their life savings and lose it all in the same day.	107	TwoSentenceSadness
Today my partner of 50 years told me that he had to end the relationship because he's married.	105	TwoSentenceSadness
"Kids, it's dinner time!" my mom called out to us.	103	TwoSentenceComedy
Polly’s stink caused a 6-car pileup while heading to the morgue, her heavy casket flipped over and crushed three pallbearers, and three men threw out their backs while digging her grave.	102	TwoSentenceComedy
The man on the skyscraper looked down on the people below him egging him on.	102	TwoSentenceSadness
Every night, I walk into my patients’ rooms and deeply massage their newborns’ heads, telling the moms that it’s beneficial for their brains.	101	TwoSentenceHorror
Last night, I found a peanut that was rotten, ate it anyway and got sick.	100	TwoSentenceComedy
My wife seemed to have forgiven my affair when she asked me to go get the laundry from the basement.	100	TwoSentenceHorror