/u/disconnectedjosh's posts in /r/TwoSentenceHorror

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Only show posts with narrations

After years of absence, my estranged father finally showed up to make good on his promise to take me fishing.

66 upvotes

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Right before my dad passed from emphysema, he passed me a small key and managed to rasp the words - "Rubies safe in closet..."

58 upvotes

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Santa realized too late that I was on the naughty list by mistake...

52 upvotes

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At 10 centimeters, the doctor instructed my wife to begin pushing the baby out...

39 upvotes

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As a DHS supervisor, people often ask me what percentage of foster kids are in an abusive household at any given time.

37 upvotes

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I ascended the ladder into my crawlspace attic, confident that I would find my childhood photo album.

35 upvotes

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I've been deaf since the age of 5, so I didn't hear the intruder when he broke into my house.

31 upvotes

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"Ventriloquist dummies are inherently creepy..."

31 upvotes

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"I'm honestly not sure if we can treat this infestation of bedbugs..."

29 upvotes

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Curiosity killed the cat...

23 upvotes

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Title	Upvotes	Mark as read	Favorited	Rating	Add to a list
After years of absence, my estranged father finally showed up to make good on his promise to take me fishing.	66
Right before my dad passed from emphysema, he passed me a small key and managed to rasp the words - "Rubies safe in closet..."	58
Santa realized too late that I was on the naughty list by mistake...	52
At 10 centimeters, the doctor instructed my wife to begin pushing the baby out...	39
As a DHS supervisor, people often ask me what percentage of foster kids are in an abusive household at any given time.	37
I ascended the ladder into my crawlspace attic, confident that I would find my childhood photo album.	35
I've been deaf since the age of 5, so I didn't hear the intruder when he broke into my house.	31
"Ventriloquist dummies are inherently creepy..."	31
"I'm honestly not sure if we can treat this infestation of bedbugs..."	29
Curiosity killed the cat...	23