/u/dragonadamant's posts
[WP] To reduce sentencing costs, prisoners spend 24 hours in an "accelerated-time" dream. Instead of accepting freedom normally, one prisoner fakes a coma, lucid-dreams in the distant 'future' for months, then wakes up spouting prophecies.
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[WP] You're a minor-league spirit, rarely summoned except at parties. Most people don't even bother to carve your rune correctly. One day, your pizza arrives, with its slices carved into a beautiful sigil. Something about the sauce seems odd.
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[WP] "The apocalypse will take place over seven days," and you're the angel in charge, but due to interpretation disagreements of "day," the sulfur is now set to arrive in another million years instead of next Tuesday. The angels under you are getting antsy and increasingly undisciplined.
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[WP] Your girlfriend's gotten used to you teleporting her on dates. You can only teleport to places you've visited on foot. She's visibly surprised to see the list of destinations now includes the Oval Office, the Marianas Trench, and the moon.
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[WP] You made a fortune as a stand-up comedian skewering high-ranking political officials. Now you're one of them, thanks to a close and bitter election, but your clerks and staff members argue constantly about whether your orders are meant to be taken seriously.
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[WP] You've decided that the latest dastardly villain in your long-running serial meets their end via hanging. Before you can write the finishing sentence, you black out in blinding pain. You awaken the next day with deep red rope marks around your neck and an impending deadline from your publisher.
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[WP] A cute girl at a party spills her water all over you. Freaking out, she offers to make it up to you with a date. Several dates later, she freaks out again when she discovers you now have plant life growing out of your chest.
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[WP] Reddit, help! I (~280m / F) periodically have my boyfriend (~1.5b / M) take me on dates to see the stars, but lately he's lost interest. AITA? // Reddit, help! My (~800m / M) girlfriend (~320m / F) loves the stars, but I've said it's a bad omen when they start getting closer. MUCH closer. AITA?
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