/u/froopynooples's posts
"Alright, welcome to the Secret Service, Mr Carter, we know you will do your best to protect the president as if he were your own daughter!"
Mark as read: Add to a list
Really, I do try to avoid looking at my phone when driving as much as possible, and I swear I only took my eyes off the road for a second.
Mark as read: Add to a list
Mark as read: Add to a list
Did you know that Country singers have a higher chance of being murdered/dying under mysterious circumstances than any other musical artist per capita?
Mark as read: Add to a list
Mark as read: Add to a list
After seeing how delicately the female chimp was able to peel a banana with its feet, the zookeeper couldn't quell his giddiness as he crept into the enclosure that night.
Mark as read: Add to a list
Mark as read: Add to a list
"If you want to escape, it's really quite simple: the pressure plate connected to the locking mechanism is calibrated to the exact weight of your wife's unborn child."
Mark as read: Add to a list
Mark as read: Add to a list