/u/guzmonster11's posts
[WP] "Farah," he said with a tremor in his voice, "I'm not who you think I am..." Farah knows exactly who he is, she's an undercover Hitman, hired by a very disgruntled ice cream man with a chip on his shoulder and a 17 year grudge.
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[WP] You've been falling through a mysterious dark hole for what feels like hours next to Big-Mouth Bertha.
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[WP] You're about to give up waiting for your Tinder date to show up, when suddenly you see a gold helicopter heading straight towards you.
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[WP] You jokingly post a conspiracy theory linking Soda Fountains to the Illuminati online. You were right, and now everyone's out to kill you.
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[WP] Whenever you click on a seemingly scammy advertisement on the internet, it turns out to be 100% true and you always benefit.
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Everyone on Earth has forgotten what happened yesterday. Fortunately (and unfortunately) you were not on Earth, and remember it perfectly.
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[WP] Suzanne has a secret. Danny has the key. Sam is bleeding out on the table. And no one has seen Greg since he left for food 4 hours ago.
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[WP] Everyone on Earth was simultaneously brainwashed yesterday. Fortunately (and unfortunately) you were not on Earth.
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