/u/jestyjest's posts in /r/TwoSentenceHorror

Year:

Only show posts with narrations

"I don't want to see you any more, I hope you understand," I said, reaching across the coffee shop table in what I hoped was a gesture of conciliation.

7218 upvotes

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I hear the creak of the leather straps being pulled taut, the salt water drips and patters onto floor, and my breathing quickens as I think back on what I did to get here

973 upvotes

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And you may find yourself in a beautiful house, with a beautiful wife, and you may ask yourself, "Well, how did I get here?"

932 upvotes

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"You mean to tell me you've been sleeping on this and you never realized it's a gas-lift bed", said my friend, incredulously.

534 upvotes

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Believe me, I get it: when you volunteer to have your photograph taken in the mysterious old tent at the funfair, whatever happens is really on you

60 upvotes

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Getting a job as a Birthday Clown is a great way to get close to children

60 upvotes

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Your wife, your children, your postman, everyone you've ever met, is a simulacrum: a very well engineered machine designed only to elicit a response from you.

53 upvotes

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If you suspect your spouse may be a synthetic masquerading as a human, it is your duty to administer the test

18 upvotes

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As I stepped off the ledge and into the dark, all I felt was a sense of peace.

14 upvotes

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We are the last, and it's our solemn duty to observe as the heat death erases all that has ever been and the universe winds itself to a close.

7 upvotes

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Title	Upvotes	Mark as read	Favorited	Rating	Add to a list
"I don't want to see you any more, I hope you understand," I said, reaching across the coffee shop table in what I hoped was a gesture of conciliation.	7218
I hear the creak of the leather straps being pulled taut, the salt water drips and patters onto floor, and my breathing quickens as I think back on what I did to get here	973
And you may find yourself in a beautiful house, with a beautiful wife, and you may ask yourself, "Well, how did I get here?"	932
"You mean to tell me you've been sleeping on this and you never realized it's a gas-lift bed", said my friend, incredulously.	534
Believe me, I get it: when you volunteer to have your photograph taken in the mysterious old tent at the funfair, whatever happens is really on you	60
Getting a job as a Birthday Clown is a great way to get close to children	60
Your wife, your children, your postman, everyone you've ever met, is a simulacrum: a very well engineered machine designed only to elicit a response from you.	53
If you suspect your spouse may be a synthetic masquerading as a human, it is your duty to administer the test	18
As I stepped off the ledge and into the dark, all I felt was a sense of peace.	14
We are the last, and it's our solemn duty to observe as the heat death erases all that has ever been and the universe winds itself to a close.	7