/u/justadumblaborer's posts
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My wife and daughter were kidnapped three days ago, and I've been trying ever since to convince my very wealthy father-in-law to just pay the ransom without incident.
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As I sit here on my throne and look out at the people all gathered to see me; I get this overwhelming sense of accomplishment.
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I crashed my car last night after I may have had a little too much to drink so I left the scene, and reported it stolen.
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A meteor recently crashed to Earth, carrying with it an alien parasite that had the ability to infect humans at an alarming rate.
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I couldn't believe it, me of all people got called up to the stage by the magician to assist him in his disappearing man trick.
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