/u/mugwort23's posts
"No I am not going to pull out you eyeballs; I just couldn't do such a thing," he blustered incredulously.
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I was greeted by the sight of a fat, panting, red-faced old man with a long ragged comb-over fallen to the wrong side whose trousers were 'round his ankles and who was standing over something that was mostly tentacles which seemed to be using them to try and crawl away as it moaned piteously.
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Like any good mad scientist he liked to play the pipe organ and he was doing so now to sublimate the frustration he felt at the fact that the young couple he'd murdered, Mr. and Mrs. Hill, were, despite his best efforts, steadfastly refusing to be brought back to life.
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'You would not believe your eyes if 10 million fireflies...,' warbled the radio as life tried to imitate art in my backyard but found it too difficult as the glowy guys there completely failed at being twinklishly magical; what with their dogged insistence on being in pairs, their stillness...
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Star light, star bright, the first star I see tonight; I wish I may, I wish I might, have the wish I wish tonight and I wish that they don't tell me to push the button in 2019.
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Gentleman Jim, cat-burglar, logophile, found himself half hanging over one side of the fence with an index finger clamped between the jaws of a guard dog on the other when a word popped into his mind which he knew he would soon understand in much, much more profound way.
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Reading a list of all the nations that have brought security to the conference when my fuck-witted friend gives me a birthday present and that's why I've got a novelty gun-lighter in my hand as I wonder which security team I hear coming around the corner.
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