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/u/mydadsnameisharold's posts

“Honey, we’re pregnant.”

6 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceHorror
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"He's been a good boy and he deserves this, so you ought to just relax and enjoy it!"

6 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceHorror
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The lovecraftian horror twisted it’s dangly appendage around Elmo’s furry red throat.

6 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceHorror
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I was reading about penile fractures- they’re more common when the woman is on top.

6 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceHorror
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I told him if he came on over we would smoke a couple joints and see what happened.

6 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceHorror
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”I assure you both, the team and I will take good care of your daughter, group examinations are quite common.”

6 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceHorror
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She said she wanted to break up.

6 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceHorror
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I was gonna give her breakfast in bed....

6 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceComedy
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After the bullets stopped flying I felt all over my body to see if I’d been hit.

6 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceHorror
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“The keto diet is perfect for you.”

6 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceHorror
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