/u/saddetective87's posts
[WP] In a rage a university Mathematics professor spends all night writing symbolic logic equations on their office chalkboard in an attempt to prove 1+1=2. By morning they've proven irrefutably that it doesn't...
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[WP] The invitation said come as you are. When John Shaft walked into the private room of the Harlem bar, he was greeted first with guns, then a drink when he showed his invitation.
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[WP] "Years ago, when the book was first being passed around, it was nothing more than a badly bundled heap of paper, parts of which would occasionally surface on the Internet. No one could have anticipated the small but devoted following this terrifying story would soon command..."
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[WP] Barney told him this would be easy. Just get a low-profile job in the mailroom and find Pepe Silvia. "If you get in trouble, go to Carol in HR," Barney said. Well, today he found Pepe Silvia, but Carol was gone. Barney wasn't answering his phone. Half the people in the office were also gone...
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[SP] "I've been hanging around with you too long -- your gibberish and tall tales are starting to make sense."
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[WP] There is a vicious storm brewing, bringing winds of torment and a rain of terror. And with it comes the haunter, a parasitic monster who feeds on man’s most primal emotions; seeking ecstasy in the torturous throes of human misery. No man, woman, or child is safe from its wickedness...
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[WP] After they found the hidden compartment and examined the stone altar and fresh blood in the bowl, the meaning of the hymn "Gimme that old-time religion" the congregation had been singing had a different meaning...
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[WP] "How did you escape?" They almost scream as you walk into the meeting. "If that is the first time you think I've escaped after being stripped naked, had all four of my limbs handcuffed to a bed, and left in the country after a night of high stakes poker, sex, and drinking, you don't know me."
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[WP] "Before I begin, I want to stress I absolutely did nothing illegal!" you say. "Just morally questionable." responded your friend. "Well, that is in the eye of the beholder..." "How about how most people would see it?" they asked. "Oh ... well, probably yes. But they'll never prove it was me."
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