/u/slightly-simian's posts in /r/TwoSentenceHorror

Year:

Only show posts with narrations

Well it's taken 72 hours, 3084 pages, no sleep and a hell of a lot of concentration but my research is finally complete and I couldn't be happier with the outcome.

1708 upvotes

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"Will this be enough to buy a pony daddy?"

459 upvotes

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Everyone was so drunk at my work's Christmas party; beer wine, punch, vodka and more.

413 upvotes

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I grimaced as my face smashed into the rough straw, a piece of which poked my eye and hurt like crazy.

264 upvotes

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I held my children to my chest so tightly, repeatedly told them that I loved them and waited for the insulin to render them unconscious.

242 upvotes

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Even though I knew how much he was suffering, when my father looked up at me from his deathbed and begged me to kill him, I had to tell him that I just couldn't do it.

178 upvotes

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I thought nothing could be worse than my son disappearing last year, that was until he started coming home every night about a month ago.

156 upvotes

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Even though I was technically a 'vegetable', I had enough of a mind to know that all of these little tubes were keeping me alive and despite what you might think, I was actually happy.

138 upvotes

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I thought to myself "Well, I guess he must just really like teaching kids how to do magic."

69 upvotes

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I hate it when my youngest gets upset at night because of the strange people screaming in her room and I have to explain all over again "They are more scared of you than you are of them".

66 upvotes

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Title	Upvotes	Mark as read	Favorited	Rating	Add to a list
Well it's taken 72 hours, 3084 pages, no sleep and a hell of a lot of concentration but my research is finally complete and I couldn't be happier with the outcome.	1708
"Will this be enough to buy a pony daddy?"	459
Everyone was so drunk at my work's Christmas party; beer wine, punch, vodka and more.	413
I grimaced as my face smashed into the rough straw, a piece of which poked my eye and hurt like crazy.	264
I held my children to my chest so tightly, repeatedly told them that I loved them and waited for the insulin to render them unconscious.	242
Even though I knew how much he was suffering, when my father looked up at me from his deathbed and begged me to kill him, I had to tell him that I just couldn't do it.	178
I thought nothing could be worse than my son disappearing last year, that was until he started coming home every night about a month ago.	156
Even though I was technically a 'vegetable', I had enough of a mind to know that all of these little tubes were keeping me alive and despite what you might think, I was actually happy.	138
I thought to myself "Well, I guess he must just really like teaching kids how to do magic."	69
I hate it when my youngest gets upset at night because of the strange people screaming in her room and I have to explain all over again "They are more scared of you than you are of them".	66