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/r/TwoSentenceComedy

Paddy thought his new girlfriend might be the one but after having a look through her panty drawer he found a nurse's outfit, a French maid's outfit, and a police woman's uniform.

58 upvotes • ClutchingMyTinkle
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My wife was mad about failed roleplay in bed

58 upvotes • Roboticfreeze
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A man walks into an orphanage and asks for a child.

58 upvotes • PersonMan53107
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I don't have a, "love for alcohol."

58 upvotes • HunterSDeadguy
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I was wondering why the ball kept getting bigger and bigger

58 upvotes • CooterMcSpooter
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I can't stop stealing people's cars.

58 upvotes • Whocaresdamit
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It was a slow news day

58 upvotes • TheTangoFox
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They suddenly realized that the rocket couldn't return.

58 upvotes • [deleted]
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"Damn I would give my soul for some mexican food right know"

58 upvotes • SetTheSerpent
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The milk was chunky.

58 upvotes • MetaphoricallyMarcus
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