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/r/TwoSentenceComedy

I saw on the news that Brandon Urie was being escorted by the police out of a local night club.

9 upvotes • Ultimateshielder
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Irony

9 upvotes • [deleted]
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Today, I saw my life flash right before my eyes.

9 upvotes • Salsal_Azar
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Recent advancements in Artificial Intelligence, or A.I., have caused much concern and controversy, yet is still preferable to what most people possess, which is I.I.

9 upvotes • Outside_Normal
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When a middle class person violates someone it is called rape , when a high society wealthy person violates someone it is called

9 upvotes • YellowDomino
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It was a close competition for the promotion.

9 upvotes • Outside_Normal
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Satan isn't the king of hell.

9 upvotes • lucasjonesgamedesign
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Stanley Kubrick couldn't think of a title for the movie he was writing

9 upvotes • CauliflowerOk3993
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Your mom was so excited to go walking on the beach....

9 upvotes • IOughtToBeThrownAway
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The are only 2 times people say 'you deserve it' is when you are famous.

9 upvotes • [deleted]
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