/u/AlmostSane67's posts in /r/TwoSentenceHorror

Year:

Only show posts with narrations

My wife is the love of my life, and if she wants to sleep in late, I'm happy to help out.

51 upvotes

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[NOV23] I finally convinced her that losing her boyfriend wasn't the end of the world, and that she still had the will to live.

49 upvotes

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Ssshhhh, it's okay sweetie, we'll both be with Mommy soon.

45 upvotes

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[JAN23] My Tinder date stormed out, calling me a two-faced bastard.

42 upvotes

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As the armed man demanded that I give him all my money, all I could do was smile.

40 upvotes

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[JUL22] I beg you, Hades, please let my wife return to the land of the living, I can't keep going like this!

39 upvotes

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My parents always told me I'd be famous some day.

30 upvotes

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My bride and I stood on the beach of our private island getaway, watching the sunset and holding hands.

28 upvotes

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I will admit, I still feel a bit of guilt for putting cyanide in Tylenol back in the 80s.

20 upvotes

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You can call me a monster if you wish, but I think it's funny to kidnap people's pets.

19 upvotes

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Title	Upvotes	Mark as read	Favorited	Rating	Add to a list
My wife is the love of my life, and if she wants to sleep in late, I'm happy to help out.	51
[NOV23] I finally convinced her that losing her boyfriend wasn't the end of the world, and that she still had the will to live.	49
Ssshhhh, it's okay sweetie, we'll both be with Mommy soon.	45
[JAN23] My Tinder date stormed out, calling me a two-faced bastard.	42
As the armed man demanded that I give him all my money, all I could do was smile.	40
[JUL22] I beg you, Hades, please let my wife return to the land of the living, I can't keep going like this!	39
My parents always told me I'd be famous some day.	30
My bride and I stood on the beach of our private island getaway, watching the sunset and holding hands.	28
I will admit, I still feel a bit of guilt for putting cyanide in Tylenol back in the 80s.	20
You can call me a monster if you wish, but I think it's funny to kidnap people's pets.	19