/u/Doctor_Murderstein's posts
[WP] You're a mad doctor trying to destroy humanity. You're not very good at it though, and all of your plans backfire. They backfire so bad that you're currently accepting you twenty-seventh Nobel Peace Prize for your efforts.
Mark as read: Add to a list
[WP] You're the world's most successful General. All enemies fall before you, no matter the odds. Your secret to success is that you keep an idiotic adult and a clever child with you at all times
Mark as read: Add to a list
[EU] Batman finally snaps and kills the joker. The entire police department is covering it up, saying the Joker 'fell down some stairs'. You're the medical examiner, who has to explain how he got his extraordinary injuries falling down some stairs, because the bat did a real number on him.
Mark as read: Add to a list
[WP] Earth stands trial for barbarism/savagery. Races across the galaxy are ready to kill all life on Earth. At the trial a Labrador Retriever is called to the stand. All races see that for their flaws, humanity has bred a perfectly benevolent and loving being. Your dog is now the galactic emperor
Mark as read: Add to a list
[EU] Batman cheats at cards, but only because Superman can't catch him in the act even with X-ray vision, and it infuriates the boyscout. The Flash can see, but won't help Superman because he thinks it's hilarious.
Mark as read: Add to a list
[WP] Nobody has a freaking clue how they've done it, but astronauts have smuggled an 800lb grand piano onto the ISS. Nobody at Nasa can figure out how angry or impressed they should be
Mark as read: Add to a list
[WP] It's 2173, and Charlie Sheen is alive. He's as crazy and drug-addled as he ever was. He's still in the news every week for consuming briefcases of cocaine. Every year he contracts or becomes patient zero for a new STD. He hasn't even slept since 2075 but the fucker refuses to die
Mark as read: Add to a list
[WP] Marines don't die; they go to hell and regroup. Literally. The prince of darkness and his demons wage a losing war against an ever-increasing number of ultra-violent, disgruntled marine forces. As the devil you literally fought God once, but this is the first time you've felt truly powerless
Mark as read: Add to a list
[WP] You're a protection dog to the child of a VIP. As the years go on you worry you're too old to handle threats on your target. After years of inaction, your human is attacked by an onslaught of ninjas and assassins. You have no idea this is your retirement party
Mark as read: Add to a list