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/u/Dominicmeoward's
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/r/TwoSentenceComedy
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2020
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My girlfriend once caught me masturbating to an optical illusion.
984 upvotes
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There was a zoo escape today.
179 upvotes
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I used to be a conductor in the subway.
21 upvotes
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I jumped out the window from the first floor.
18 upvotes
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I used to be a judge who specializes in religious criminal cases.
15 upvotes
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Last week I was arrested for taking out my thing, bending it upwards and peeing into my bush.
1 upvotes
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My girlfriend once caught me masturbating to an optical illusion.
984
--
10
9
8
7
6
5
4
3
2
1
0
There was a zoo escape today.
179
--
10
9
8
7
6
5
4
3
2
1
0
I used to be a conductor in the subway.
21
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10
9
8
7
6
5
4
3
2
1
0
I jumped out the window from the first floor.
18
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10
9
8
7
6
5
4
3
2
1
0
I used to be a judge who specializes in religious criminal cases.
15
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10
9
8
7
6
5
4
3
2
1
0
Last week I was arrested for taking out my thing, bending it upwards and peeing into my bush.
1
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10
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8
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