/u/Earl_Lander's posts in /r/shittyaskreddit

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If your penis could talk, what would it say to you?

26 upvotes

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Is it ok to fart underneath the sheets to keep me, my wife, and my girlfriend all warm and fuzzy?

17 upvotes

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What in the fucking hell do women want?

11 upvotes

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Do Italians shoot pasta instead of cum?

8 upvotes

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Does anyone else save their daily cum and their daily shit all day so that they can use it to make Breakfast Cum and Shit Scrambled Eggs Deluxe?

7 upvotes

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Every time I pee, my penis makes the sound of a trombone playing the scale descendingly. Is this of concern?

7 upvotes

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Can a Giraffe fully deep throat a Blue Whale?

6 upvotes

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If you were to cut pampers into a thong for your GILF date night, would these be called Thampers?

5 upvotes

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For 1 million dollars, would you: A. Eat 100 pounds of fresh cow poop in one sitting, no time limit, or B. Give a 1-hour blowjob to a random homeless vet live on tv?

5 upvotes

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I performed my own colonoscopy with an Amazon camera. Why does my throat itch so bad?

5 upvotes

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Title	Upvotes	Mark as read	Favorited	Rating	Add to a list
If your penis could talk, what would it say to you?	26
Is it ok to fart underneath the sheets to keep me, my wife, and my girlfriend all warm and fuzzy?	17
What in the fucking hell do women want?	11
Do Italians shoot pasta instead of cum?	8
Does anyone else save their daily cum and their daily shit all day so that they can use it to make Breakfast Cum and Shit Scrambled Eggs Deluxe?	7
Every time I pee, my penis makes the sound of a trombone playing the scale descendingly. Is this of concern?	7
Can a Giraffe fully deep throat a Blue Whale?	6
If you were to cut pampers into a thong for your GILF date night, would these be called Thampers?	5
For 1 million dollars, would you: A. Eat 100 pounds of fresh cow poop in one sitting, no time limit, or B. Give a 1-hour blowjob to a random homeless vet live on tv?	5
I performed my own colonoscopy with an Amazon camera. Why does my throat itch so bad?	5