/u/HarambeCantMeltSteel's posts in /r/TwoSentenceHorror

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Only show posts with narrations

I thought it was a simple cyst or zit when I started squeezing it, but so far I have lost a little over two pints of blood.

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With a deep sigh, Smurfette said, "Papa Smurf... I am a lesbian."

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Death comes for us all.

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[NSFW] NSFW

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The astrophysicist turned from the blackboard to face his colleagues. "Gentlemen," he smugly said, "behold the mathematical solution to the Fermi Paradox, clearly demonstrating that we Earthlings are utterly alone in the universe."

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She was found guilty on both counts of prostitution.

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With about a minute to go before the big job interview, I ran into the bathroom to relieve myself.

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Superheroes are real

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As my ex-wife and my girlfriend approached each other, I braced myself for the melee to come.

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With all eyes on me, I stepped out on stage in front of the hundreds who were there for the comedy show

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Title	Upvotes	Mark as read	Favorited	Rating	Add to a list
I thought it was a simple cyst or zit when I started squeezing it, but so far I have lost a little over two pints of blood.	4
With a deep sigh, Smurfette said, "Papa Smurf... I am a lesbian."	4
Death comes for us all.	4
[NSFW] NSFW	4
The astrophysicist turned from the blackboard to face his colleagues. "Gentlemen," he smugly said, "behold the mathematical solution to the Fermi Paradox, clearly demonstrating that we Earthlings are utterly alone in the universe."	3
She was found guilty on both counts of prostitution.	3
With about a minute to go before the big job interview, I ran into the bathroom to relieve myself.	2
Superheroes are real	2
As my ex-wife and my girlfriend approached each other, I braced myself for the melee to come.	2
With all eyes on me, I stepped out on stage in front of the hundreds who were there for the comedy show	2