/u/HarambeCantMeltSteel's posts
Twisted into pallid blobs by the intense fallout radiation, the four survivors mindlessly obeyed their mistress' voice, piped up through the ground-level, periscope-like speaker from her safe, subterranean chamber.
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Why did Americans set up their government to so strongly avoid the word "Ministry," which is a norm in European government agencies?
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My time with the seven dwarves came to a close when I bit into a poisoned apple and went into a catatonic coma.
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From my prison, I contemplated my new life: to fight upon command for the pleasure of my masters until death's cool hand rescues me.
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As I awoke from the anesthesia, the smiling doctor told me that the castration had been a complete success.
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"Ma'am, I don't care if you were just trying to be helpful in responding to the Amber Alert and reporting the location of the crime boss' car so we could catch him..."
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I handed my girlfriend my credit card and said, "Pick up a dozen eggs, some toilet paper, milk, and whatever else you think we need."
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