/u/HonoraryBallsack's posts in /r/onionheadlines
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Ben Shapiro Emerges From Public Restroom Snickering about 'Weirdos' at Urinals Who Didn't Drop Their Pants to Their Ankles and Lift Up Their Shirts Before Peeing
25 upvotes
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Lawyers Reassure Panicking Trump that Hypothetically Clogging Gold Mar-a-Lago Toilet Due to Totally Normal Human Diet Counts as Official Presidential Act
19 upvotes
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J.D. Vance Indignantly Removes Butt Plug During Live Fox News Appearance to Emphasize He's Just Normal Guy with Perfectly Normal Punisher-Themed Butt Plug
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Trump Courts Voters Seeking Normal Person to Vote For By Inexplicably Having Cartoonish Team of Dubious Doctors, Fixers, and Other Assorted Henchmen at His Beck and Call
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Lucky Iowa Truck Driver and Trump Superfan Named as Final Contestant for Upcoming Season of 'The Apprentice: 5th Avenue Murder Victim'
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Ben Shapiro Curls Up in Race Car Bed with Family of Pet Rats to Pen Scathing Indictment of Left's Childish, Baseless "Weird" Attacks
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