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/u/HybridPumpkin's posts

I Opened My Sister's Photoshop Files

2759 upvotes • r/nosleep
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I used to date a cross-eyed girl.

461 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceComedy
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I thought taking the shell off of my racing snail would make it faster.

417 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceComedy
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"You see, Billy, this is why we need to stay inside."

379 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceHorror
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I would always think to myself, "If only I was taller, if only I was more handsome, if only I was stronger."

339 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceHorror
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Dad told me Mommy had Parkinson’s Disease, because she was always twitching, and I believed him.

177 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceHorror
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I Found a Phone on a Train. I Should Have Left it Alone.

133 upvotes • r/nosleep
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I always forget what that kid's name is.

132 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceHorror
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I've always read the newspaper obituaries.

75 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceHorror
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I'm A Piano Teacher. I'm Worried About One of my Students. (Part 1)

62 upvotes • r/nosleep
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