/u/Hyperspades's posts
[WP] You are suddenly informed that killing the worst person on the planet will result in all evil vanishing for good. After killing thousands, you begin to wonder who exactly this person could be...
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[WP] You're in a bar and decide to flirt with a beautiful girl. "Did you fall from heaven, because you're an angel!" You didn't expect her to reply sadly, "How'd you tell?"
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[WP] Life is a video game, with a good ending (heaven) and a bad ending (hell). You are the first person in all of history to discover the secret third ending.
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[WP] The Boltzmann Brain theory is true - your conscience is the only “true consciousness” and the entire universe only exists as a part of it. If you cease to exist, so does everything else. This fact was just discovered and made public.
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[WP] Your wish for omnipotence is granted. Upon ascending you realize two things: Every planet has a god, and the one controlling Earth is a bumbling idiot who has no idea what they're doing.
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[WP] Around the world, everyone reveres you as an omnipotent god with an unlimited supply of powers. Truth is, you only have one power - The ability to create perfectly realistic illusions. People are beginning to catch on.
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[WP] You are the most dangerous parasite in the universe, capable of completely taking over an organism's body and making them rely on you to survive. You are also the last of your species, quarantined and confined on a planet billions of light years from any other life. You are known as a "brain".
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[WP] After a long and happy life, you, Kevin McCallister, have passed away. Shortly after, you reincarnate as a large exotic bird native to South America - also named Kevin. Some weird old man seems hell-bent on catching you, unaware just who he is dealing with.
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