/u/Lots42's posts in /r/TwoSentenceHorror

Year:

So far me and my family have been safe from the zombie apocalypse tearing the world apart.

261 upvotes

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Every day I wake up, take a shower, have a cold breakfast and go downstairs.

260 upvotes

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I told the crazy old lady to stop calling here about her son, he had died decades ago.

256 upvotes

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I'm glad my cat didn't pay attention when I tried to stop her bringing me dead birds.

252 upvotes

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I have to get the cops involved over this parrot that recently made a home in my backyard.

235 upvotes

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Dad told me to dump the extra weight so we can outrace the hurricane.

217 upvotes

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At least my very elderly dog passed away painlessly in my arms.

212 upvotes

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I thought myself lucky I found a mechanic at the gas station so late at night.

199 upvotes

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The plane crash survivors searched the island for parts all night and got the radio working just at sunrise.

198 upvotes

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I used to screw around and look for unsecured security cameras online.

196 upvotes

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Title	Upvotes	Mark as read	Favorited	Rating	Add to a list
So far me and my family have been safe from the zombie apocalypse tearing the world apart.	261
Every day I wake up, take a shower, have a cold breakfast and go downstairs.	260
I told the crazy old lady to stop calling here about her son, he had died decades ago.	256
I'm glad my cat didn't pay attention when I tried to stop her bringing me dead birds.	252
I have to get the cops involved over this parrot that recently made a home in my backyard.	235
Dad told me to dump the extra weight so we can outrace the hurricane.	217
At least my very elderly dog passed away painlessly in my arms.	212
I thought myself lucky I found a mechanic at the gas station so late at night.	199
The plane crash survivors searched the island for parts all night and got the radio working just at sunrise.	198
I used to screw around and look for unsecured security cameras online.	196