| I told my wife that I wanted to be cremated. | 446 | | | | |
| My first time in a sensory deprivation tank, my biggest fear was getting trapped inside. | 18 | | | | |
| People tell me I have beautiful teeth. | 3 | | | | |
| They keep playing peekaboo with my infant daughter. | 2 | | | | |
| The new “super rabies” took effect frighteningly fast, so bites were treated as “kill on sight.” | 1 | | | | |
| Grandma always said she’d take her secret to the grave. | 1 | | | | |
| The cameras watch my every move while I work, and cite me if I slow down. | 1 | | | | |
| As a visual effects artist, it wasn’t surprising when the police pulled me over for “a body in the backseat.” | 1 | | | | |
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