/u/SleepyLoner's posts
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[WP] Your girlfriend has been complaining that some asshole was interfering with her job. Meanwhile, you are an elite bodyguard who has just stopped the tenth attempt on your boss's life.
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[WP] A rich man discovers that he only has two years left to live. With no relatives to inherit his fortune, he disguises himself as a beggar and resolves to give his wealth to the first person who helps him.
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[WP] You are known as the Ultimate Substitute Teacher, but not because of your exceptional skills. Rather, everything you teach is so utterly and ridiculously wrong that students are driven to find out the truth just to correct you.
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[WP] Animal translators were finally invented. Someone from an animal rights group asked a cat about their thoughts on animal rights. "I won't stand for it! Why should we exploit humans and let them do all the carrying and food giving to us!? Not on my watch!"
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[WP] Your dad is wanted in twenty countries, your mom is a serial kille, your little brother is a genius hacker, and your little sister has just joined the Illuminati. None of them would ever want to anger you, though.
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[WP] Everyone has powers locked within them. Each power is different, and the longer it takes for a power to manifest, the greater it is. A 100 year old man is being hunted by the government for still being powerless.
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[WP] Every time someone says "Long live the Queen", the Queen's life is extended by one second. You only notice this when the Queen looked terrified when only a few people say it during a public speech.
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[WP] The heroes stumble upon a man shoving a fistful of coins into the mouth of a monster. Apparently he's the one responsible for all the loot.
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