/u/SliceLegitimate8674's posts in /r/TwoSentenceComedy

Year:

Only show posts with narrations

The soldier awoke from his operation limbless; unable to turn the pages of his favourite book

105 upvotes

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I'm suing my doctor for malpractice.

100 upvotes

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"No, I am your father", Darth Vader told a horrified Luke

92 upvotes

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A great man once said to take the plank out of your own eye before you criticize the speck in your brother's

89 upvotes

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It was the best of times

88 upvotes

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Shakespeare didn't write anything

88 upvotes

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"I never wanted kids", I admitted to my wife when she was pregnant.

87 upvotes

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"It's not me, it's you", she said firmly, determined to break up with her awful boyfriend.

84 upvotes

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"I'm worried your dad's cheating", mom said to me.

82 upvotes

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My shadow twerked; I didn't

77 upvotes

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Title	Upvotes	Mark as read	Favorited	Rating	Add to a list
The soldier awoke from his operation limbless; unable to turn the pages of his favourite book	105
I'm suing my doctor for malpractice.	100
"No, I am your father", Darth Vader told a horrified Luke	92
A great man once said to take the plank out of your own eye before you criticize the speck in your brother's	89
It was the best of times	88
Shakespeare didn't write anything	88
"I never wanted kids", I admitted to my wife when she was pregnant.	87
"It's not me, it's you", she said firmly, determined to break up with her awful boyfriend.	84
"I'm worried your dad's cheating", mom said to me.	82
My shadow twerked; I didn't	77