/u/Vengeful-Pickle's posts
[WP] “But, these are my hands!” You bellow in agony. “Not anymore,” retorts Satan. “Now, let me show you what they can really do” he snickers.
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You’ve lived your entire life so-far without an internal monologue. Suddenly one day you hear a voice screaming “I can’t take it anymore! I’ve been quiet long enough.”
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[WP] All songs about heartbreak are about the same demon. Run-Around Sue, Mustang Sally, Gloria, Lola, Rhonda and now Marie (the name of your latest flame) are the same succubus muse. She just likes to hear songs written about her.
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[WP] Reasons your application has been rejected. “Too much go in your flow.” “Too much clap in your flap.” “Too much skeet in your fleet.” “Too much power in your flower” “Too much heat in your peat.” Until today...
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[WP] Santa is holding a press conference. “We can assure you there was no fraud.” Santa begins, “This was the most secure count in history. We have checked the list twice now; we are ready to certify the 2020 naughty/nice list.” Opponents in the crowd begin to chant: “Lose the List!”
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