| This is why I ❤️ my job | 15 | dishwashers | | | | |
| I spent so much time cleaning my bedroom that I collapsed due to neat exhaustion. | 12 | oneliners | | | | |
| Jesus really spoke to me last night when I was drunk, which is odd – he said, “this WAS water” | 1 | oneliners | | | | |
| I hate answering questions. Ask me anything | 1 | AMA | | | | |
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