/u/awesomo_prime's posts in /r/TwoSentenceHorror

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Only show posts with narrations

Nobody knew what my experiments were supposed to be nor questioned why I was even on this space deployment.

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"Do you know how many piggies it takes to pick a wolf clean", little piggy asked the wolf in the pit.

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I emptied the lawnmower's gas and removed the spark plug to eliminate any chance of an accidental start.

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I told my guests I clean in a painter's suit and facemask because I'm OCD about germs splattering about when I clean.

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"I can't be a grandfather", said the 30 year old.

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When we were 10, my sister and I's combined weight was 150lbs; we're now 25, how much do we weigh?

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You, me, us - we became the perfect police state.

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I recently posted an ad on r/r4r for F4FM to eat me.

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My grandmothers love to make Thanksgiving puns, naming dishes after whomever's missing that year.

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With my first check as a professional, I feel as if I'm finally escaping poverty and pulling myself up by my bootstraps.

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Title	Upvotes	Mark as read	Favorited	Rating	Add to a list
Nobody knew what my experiments were supposed to be nor questioned why I was even on this space deployment.	3
"Do you know how many piggies it takes to pick a wolf clean", little piggy asked the wolf in the pit.	3
I emptied the lawnmower's gas and removed the spark plug to eliminate any chance of an accidental start.	3
I told my guests I clean in a painter's suit and facemask because I'm OCD about germs splattering about when I clean.	3
"I can't be a grandfather", said the 30 year old.	3
When we were 10, my sister and I's combined weight was 150lbs; we're now 25, how much do we weigh?	2
You, me, us - we became the perfect police state.	2
I recently posted an ad on r/r4r for F4FM to eat me.	2
My grandmothers love to make Thanksgiving puns, naming dishes after whomever's missing that year.	2
With my first check as a professional, I feel as if I'm finally escaping poverty and pulling myself up by my bootstraps.	2