/u/baltinerdist's posts
[WP] Inside the gritty reality of nursery rhymes, one grizzled detective just wants to roll on home and give his dog a bone, but the criminals aren't just off playing paddywhack. They call you "This Old Man" and these are the stories from your beat.
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[WP] As the proprietor of a haunted carnival, you've never had any trouble luring unsuspecting kids to the twisted attractions designed to steal their souls. That is, until a young man named Robert Lawrence Stine walked through the main gate.
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[EU] Captain Picard, fresh off his experience with the "Darmok and Jalad at Tanagra" culture, finds himself on a new planet that also communicates symbolically. In this case, the culture communicates exclusively by referencing TV show catchphrases from the 20th and 21st centuries.
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[EU] There’s never been a family with children so awful that such drastic measures had to be taken, but here we are. Your new nannies are both Mary Poppins AND Nanny McPhee.
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[WP] As a genie, you are bound to the genie culture of twisting and warping wishes for nefarious ironic ends. However, you find yourself oddly sympathetic to your latest master and try to coach them into making a better worded wish.
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[WP] "I hate to be the Bear of Bad News," he said, scratching the fur under his chin with his claws.
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[EU] Freddy is having a hard time killing you. Turns out, every night you dream the plot to a different movie and it usually works out in your favor when he tries to come in.
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[WP] Everybody woke up on September 3rd realizing two things. One, no one remembers September 2nd and two, a lot has changed. A whole lot.
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[WP] The end of the fairy tale is approaching and, of course, it is a happy ending. Except that the happy ending itself thinks the protagonists don't deserve it and refuses to show up.
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