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/u/cindybubbles's posts

As a dealer in a casino, you learn to keep calm during emergencies.

11 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceHorror
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I came home to see my wife frying something in a pan.

10 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceComedy
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When I got my new robot butler, I learned quickly to watch what I say because he interprets everything as a literal command. NSFW

10 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceComedy
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[DEC2020] Sitting on Santa's lap is fun because my douchebag ex-boyfriend is Santa this year!

10 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceComedy
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I’ll forgive my ex-husband for the adultery and subsequent divorce.

10 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceComedy
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I sent my daughter over to her father’s house with a surprise chocolate cake that she helped me to make.

10 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceComedy
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At the end every party, I set up an elaborate treasure hunt for all my drunk friends.

10 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceComedy
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"I thought I told you to get the fuck outta here!" yelled the shop owner to me.

10 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceComedy
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What's one way to turn a mild-mannered cleaner into a raging homicidal maniac?

10 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceComedy
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When Notre Dame burned to the ground, the media said that it was an accident.

10 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceHorror
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