/u/goliath276's posts in /r/TwoSentenceHorror

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My wife has been in a coma for over a year now and not a day goes by when I'm not sitting beside her hospital bed.

11649 upvotes

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My favorite words to hear are, "I'd sell my soul to the devil for ..."

959 upvotes

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After waiting by my car, which was parked on the side of the road for nearly 6 hours, finally someone stopped to help me.

631 upvotes

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Your honor it's true I offered to take her head shots.

507 upvotes

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My son threw a terrible fit when I sent him to bed without his dinner.

374 upvotes

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Because of my proclivity to harm animals, my parents were told that without assistance I was at risk for becoming a serial killer.

365 upvotes

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Because of my wife's disability, I have to bathe her, fix her hair and apply her makeup, but she never complains. I tried to tell them when they were lowering her into the ground that she didn't die in that accident, but the idiots just wouldn't listen.

282 upvotes

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My wife came home early and caught me in our bed on top of her sister.

245 upvotes

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I was awakened by the sound of my bedroom window breaking and a stranger climbing into my home.

195 upvotes

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As the police chief, I informed the news reporter about the taskforce the department had assembled to find who was abducting and killing all the teenage girls in our city.

191 upvotes

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Title	Upvotes	Mark as read	Favorited	Rating	Add to a list
My wife has been in a coma for over a year now and not a day goes by when I'm not sitting beside her hospital bed.	11649
My favorite words to hear are, "I'd sell my soul to the devil for ..."	959
After waiting by my car, which was parked on the side of the road for nearly 6 hours, finally someone stopped to help me.	631
Your honor it's true I offered to take her head shots.	507
My son threw a terrible fit when I sent him to bed without his dinner.	374
Because of my proclivity to harm animals, my parents were told that without assistance I was at risk for becoming a serial killer.	365
Because of my wife's disability, I have to bathe her, fix her hair and apply her makeup, but she never complains. I tried to tell them when they were lowering her into the ground that she didn't die in that accident, but the idiots just wouldn't listen.	282
My wife came home early and caught me in our bed on top of her sister.	245
I was awakened by the sound of my bedroom window breaking and a stranger climbing into my home.	195
As the police chief, I informed the news reporter about the taskforce the department had assembled to find who was abducting and killing all the teenage girls in our city.	191