WritingPrompts

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[WP] Yesterday a man came up to you and said “Long live the emperor” before running away. It happened again three times this morning. You have no idea what they’re talking about, but you’re pretty sure they’re yakuza.	10
[WP] As you walk into the department store, the alien storekeeper looks at you aghast. “What are you doing with your hands naked like that?” They exclaim, mouth open. “Put some gloves on! You’re going to cause panic!”	10
[WP] The sound of typewriters is interrupted by by a loud voice. “Oh my God! I’ve done it!” The room goes silent as one hundred heads turn toward the speaker. “I’ve found a use for decaf coffee!” The speaker exclaims triumphantly.	9
[WP] You knew getting involved in competitive jam making was a tough business, but it’s starting to get ridiculous. At the last county fair you had to avoid professional hit men and magical curses—you’re pretty sure someone even let loose a baby dragon.	9
[WP] The most complicated part of time travel isn’t the physics. It’s managing all the well meaning people who travel back and offer historic people small technological aids. More than one famous general owes their fame to countless hours playing Clash of Clans.	9
[SP] A parallel universe, mysterious, dark, and unforgiving—where scissors beat rock, rock beats paper, and you better believe paper beats scissors.	9
[WP] “What do you have to say for yourself?” Your mother asks sternly. You try to respond, but nothing comes out. Confused, you look around and notice the cat trying to sneak out of the room, holding your tongue in its mouth.	9
[WP] You come from a happy family. Your parents are loving, supportive, and kind. You literally cannot think of anything they’ve ever done that could be considered evil, mean, or even unfair. That is, until the day you see their browser history.	9
[WP] “911, what is your emergency?” “Someone just gave me the finger!” “Ma’am, this is an emergency channel reserved for life threatening issues.” “You don’t understand—I’m still holding on to it!”	9
[WP] Theoretical physicists prove that Santa Claus is bound by quantum mechanics. This implies the existence of children who are simultaneously naughty and nice. You are the elf in charge of Christmas pets and you’ve just received a very large order for cats.	9

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