/u/mortimermcmirestinks's posts
[EU] Bastard child of Chaos and Confusion, sister to Psychosis, cousin of Madness, Discord is her cousin and Cthulhu is her twin, spawn of the Elder Gods and the Old Ones, she decides to break away from family tradition and go into a new line of work. This is the story of the Wii Fit Trainer.
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The radio newscast comes on, "Our thoughts and prayers go out to the families and friends of the victims of today's tragic shooting."
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[WP] You're shopping when the in-store speakers come on. "We're sorry to interrupt, but we're afraid that there has been a mistranslation. This is not Trader Joe's. This is Traitor Joe's. Please respond accordingly. The doors are now locked."
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[WP] They say that a bird in hand is worth two in the bush. Little do they know that the oppressed and under-appreciated bush-birds have begun to secretly plan a rebellion against the upper-class elite hand-birds. War is brewing.
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[TT] By all rights, people ahould be celebrating the Christmas season. But, for some unknown reason, instead of late December, it's now the 83rd of October -- and each day gets spookier and scarier than the last.
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[EU] In Paris, a rat in the hat of a redheaded young man is becoming a famous chef. In Baltimore, a rat is doing something slightly different. This is the story of the rodent that lives in a hat belonging to one Hannibal Lecter.
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[WP] You've done the research, dug through all the data, consulted with every scientist, mystic, priest, and wizard, searched classified government documents, parsed ancient and modern codes, and finally discovered the truth: somehow, the world really did end in 2012... nine years ago.
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[WP] You go in for a routine checkup. The doctor comes back with a confused look and says "I'm not sure how to tell you this, but you don't have any blood."
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