/u/mydadsnameisharold's posts in /r/TwoSentenceHorror

Year:

Only show posts with narrations

“I’m sorry, I tried to stock up, but everywhere I looked was sold out of food.”

22 upvotes

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I really need to lose some weight, I better stop cooking with butter.

22 upvotes

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Out of nowhere a fat black fly buzzed straight into his mouth.

22 upvotes

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I’d rather starve to death than eat any of the other survivors.

22 upvotes

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Eighty percent of my friends and family developed an incredibly rare cancer in the part of the brain that processes social memories.

22 upvotes

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All these necrophilia posts on here are a little misleading- it's not as fun as it sounds.

22 upvotes

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“Please, I’m not ready, I don’t want to die!”

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I am but a simple shepherd, it’s not proud work but it keeps my family from hunger.

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“I fucking hate when an eyelash gets in my eye!”

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A decrepit, pathetic homeless man came begging and grabbed me by the shirt sleeve.

21 upvotes

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Title	Upvotes	Mark as read	Favorited	Rating	Add to a list
“I’m sorry, I tried to stock up, but everywhere I looked was sold out of food.”	22
I really need to lose some weight, I better stop cooking with butter.	22
Out of nowhere a fat black fly buzzed straight into his mouth.	22
I’d rather starve to death than eat any of the other survivors.	22
Eighty percent of my friends and family developed an incredibly rare cancer in the part of the brain that processes social memories.	22
All these necrophilia posts on here are a little misleading- it's not as fun as it sounds.	22
“Please, I’m not ready, I don’t want to die!”	22
I am but a simple shepherd, it’s not proud work but it keeps my family from hunger.	22
“I fucking hate when an eyelash gets in my eye!”	22
A decrepit, pathetic homeless man came begging and grabbed me by the shirt sleeve.	21